hanging there.

the past few wks have been torturous.
As i close a chapter of my frenship with someone, whom i trusted, and knew somewhat well, it pains me to see that this had to come to such an end.
Time will heal all wounds. Those inflicted on me and by me.
I tried to put myself in the person's shoes, and say that.. well... it muz be hard.. and i tried to comprehend.
But i juz couldnt.
I realised that the basis of that inablility to comprehend stemed from the different priorities we have in life.
I agree that i did the person wrong, and that i'm sorry abt it.though sorry cannot work wonders.
BUT.... i wont bring it this far.
even if u tell me that u have forgiven me, i can still see the smoke behind the curtains.

i think it wld be better for us not to meet.and i dun feel like meeting the person anymore.
ZILCH. NOPE.
somehow, i'm starting to get mad at the person.
The bd msg was juz lip service, and i think i deserve better.
i mean, if you dun feel like emailling me a bd msg, then dun.
Cos i'm nt forcing u to do so.
and u dun have to feel compel to maintain gd r/s with me.

miss ten has been driving me crazy for the past 1 wk... and i really need a break.
my own packing is almost done... juz that i got overweight luggage... and not even space for everything!!!
i need a break frm the company pple who are asking more on the company tat i'm going to wrok for.
the start up that i'm working for shld have been a secret... and i had on many occassions said a white lie.. so that i dun ahve to answer those qns..
it doesnt' help that there are pple who are going ard the company , shouting at the top of the roof that she's coming back...

i need to be able to laugh at myself....
the overcritical spirit of myself.. is nt doing me gd..
God, pls come thr' for me!